No words

I'm having a really hard time posting something today.

Have you ever had an experience that changes the way you view life? That helps clarify what is truly important--and makes everything else in life seem trivial? I had one of those experiences 2 weeks ago when the bishop of my home ward was murdered in the church foyer. I'm having a hard time describing how I have felt, or what I have witnessed. Shock. Heartbreak. Fear. Hope. Love. Courage. The past two weeks I have seen the power of God manifested boldly in the lives of those I love, and it has been truly amazing. Hearing Julie (his wife) bear testimony of the Plan of Salvation and trusting in God's plan for each of us strengthened my own testimony. Truly, I have never witnessed greater faith, than in watching the Sannar family deal with this tragedy.

And so I'm sort of feeling like everything I talk about on this blog is really trivial...

But since I promised to report (I missed reporting last week because I was out of town)---I lost another 2.5 pounds.

A Pinkalicious Party

Miss A turned five years old last week. I can't believe it! The tradition in our family is that the kids have their first REAL birthday party (with friends, decorations, etc) when they turn five, so Miss A has been looking forward to this for months! She decided to have a Pinkalicious Party, which was a total blast. If you haven't read the book Pinkalicious, DO! It's so cute.

Miss A waiting for her guests

We played balloon games while we waited for everyone to arrive.

We started the party by reading the book.

Then Auntie K & I helped the girls get decked out with pink nail polish, eye shadow, & lipstick.

The girls did Pinkalicious activity pages--mazes, coloring pages, & a word search.

And made Pinkalicious wands.

And of course, ate Pinkalicious cupcakes....

We also had a giant cupcake with candles on it. It was absolutely hideous; it completely fell apart. Hence I did not post any pictures of it. Miss A loved it though. What a sweetheart---so forgiving of my cake decorating inadequacies.

opened presents....

and pulled a pinata.

Here is the entire gang with their loot.

Happy 5th Birthday Miss A! I love you!!!

Baby Steps

This week I lost a 1/2 of a pound. I know it doesn't sound like much, but I am VERY happy with this loss for a couple of different reasons. First, today I am feeling quite female (lots of bloating--you know what I mean) and so I am sure that the scale is not accurate and that I most likely lost at least a pound.

Second, last Tuesday was my anniversary. I ate the most delicious dinner--Macadamia Nut Shrimp & Chicken. It was divine! And no, it wasn't low-fat. But I choose brown rice instead of white, and had vegetables instead of fries or fruit. And the shrimp was not fried. So, it was relatively healthy. :D

And third, yesterday was Miss A's 5th birthday (upcoming pics in my next post). I purposely made strawberry cupcakes with buttercream frosting to avoid temptation, since I generally don't like strawberry cake and I prefer cream cheese frosting. However, I did end up indulging in a couple of cupcakes.

In the past holidays and celebrations have really screwed up my weight loss plans. It seems like the older I get, the more celebrations I encounter. So I am truly happy with my .5 lb weight loss this week. I was able to enjoy myself, but not go overboard. :D

As a side note, in case any of you are interested in trying out the South Beach Diet, they claim that this diet is particularly favorable for getting rid of belly fat. I thought that was kind of strange, since I've always been told that it's exercise that helps you lose fat in certain places...not the type of foods you eat. HOWEVER, I lost these same 10 pounds about 6 months ago on WW (ended up gaining them back) and this time around the pounds have come off in totally different places. As claimed, they really have come off in my mid-section. So for what it's worth, if you want to get rid of belly fat, I totally recommend the South Beach Diet.

A Boring Summer

Recently a friend asked me, "What have you been up to this summer?" It's a simple question, so I'm sure she was surprised at my glassy-eyed stare. What did I do this summer? My mind went completely blank. "Well, we've been sort of...well...nothing really," I stammered. I felt sort of foolish (like a lazy parent) and I found myself thinking about this question for the rest of the day.

I really like to do fun things. I love to go on vacations. I love going on outings to museums or amusement parks. I love to fill my days with things outside of the house. So why didn't I do any of them this summer???? How did the summer just slip away from me? At first, I felt kind of lazy and ashamed for making my kids have a boring summer. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that a BORING summer is exactly what my family needed.

The last two years our family has been turned upside down. We went from having two kids, to having four. Having four children (the youngest 2 being only 17 months apart) has been extremely overwhelming for me. I can't really put into words what it is like. It's just hard to leave the house with four young children. So that alone has been stressful. But in addition to that, we started homeschooling (another very difficult task, especially since I have a baby and toddler who need lots of attention). Also, my husband and I have been serving in leadership callings in our church. And on top of my husband's already demanding career, he has added 2 other jobs to help cover our expenses. Life has just been INSANELY busy and difficult. Don't get me wrong. We've had lots of happy moments and have made a lot of fun family memories. But, it's just been a demanding couple of years. And I have really been needing a break.

And so, this summer we didn't go on any fancy vacations (Afterall, vacations with children are not vacations at all. It is so much work for a parent--more work than staying at home. I wish someone would have told me that BEFORE I had kids. haha!) I spent my days building forts, playing games, reading books, and watching movies (probably a little too many of the latter). I played with Baby C and helped her learn to crawl. Right now I am helping Miss R learn to the use the potty. I helped Miss A learn to read. I supervised Miss L cooking her first meal and watched her become engrossed in the The Chronicles of Narnia. Yes, we were bored at times. But I think a little boredom is healthy; it helps foster the imagination.

So bring on the boredom because I know in a couple of weeks when school starts again....I'm going to go nuts! :D

I made it!!!

Phew! I made it! I have finally finished Phase 1 of the South Beach Diet. Now on to Phase 2, which I will stay on until I no longer need to lose weight (I have a hard time believing I'll ever enter Phase 3). In Phase 2 I get to add up to 3 pieces of fruit and 3 whole grains each day. I feel so spoiled. :D I think maybe the author of this diet is on to something. After restricting myself to the EXTREME for 2 weeks, I feel like I'm indulging when I pop a strawberry into my mouth. Fruit tastes like candy! The strangest thing is that this morning I was SO EXCITED to eat something other than eggs. I prepared oatmeal with blueberries. I couldn't wait to eat it. And then, I took a bite and thought it was disgusting! I tried to force myself to eat, but all I kept thinking was that I'd rather have scrambled eggs!!!! LOL! So weird!!!!

I lost 4.5 pounds this week, for a total of 10 lbs. Not bad for 2 weeks!!! Now my weight loss will drop to the normal (and healthy) 1-2 pounds per week. I am really excited about how things are going...but if I'm being completely honest...I have been SO GRUMPY! Just ask my poor husband. I cannot believe how grumpy I have been. I mentioned last week that I feel like a lot of entertainment disappeared when the food disappeared...and I find myself having a difficult time finding an "out" to my stressful days. And seriously--with four kids under 7, EVERY day is stressful. I need to find another way to treat myself other than food. Any ideas?

Here is a list of junk food I passed up this week. I like this list because it's a reminder for me of the sacrifices I am making, regardless of what the scale shows.

Ice cream (4 nights in a row)

Cinnamon rolls (Could KILL my husband for making them)

A variety of candy (purchased for Miss A's pinata)

Blueberry Macaroon Tart (it was calling my name, I swear)

I have to say that I really feel like I've learned a lot about healthy eating over the past 2 weeks. As I mentioned in previous posts, I've done Weight Watchers a couple of times and I have learned all about filling up on good foods (high fiber, low fat). But I have never really thought much about carbs. I've tried lots of times to eat more veggies, but giving up the carbs is what ultimately FORCED me to eat more vegetables. I enjoy the challenge of eating 2 cups of veggies with lunch and dinner. It helps me stay focused on eating the right foods. And after 2 cups of veggies and a little lean protein, I really don't have much room left to eat carbs. Yay!!!

So now on to week three! Thanks for your support everybody! It really helps me to know that you are all keeping me accountable!

Drum roll please....

Well, today marks the end of week 1 of the South Beach Diet. Good Heavens! Let's get these first 2 weeks OVER WITH!!! This no carbs thing is getting really old. Haha! :)

I am happy to say that I did lose weight this week---5.5 pounds! That amount of weight is pretty typical for a first week of dieting on Weight Watchers as well, so I find myself a little frustrated that I sacrificed SO MUCH this week (more than I ever did on WW) and still only lost 5-6 pounds. But I won't complain too much about it. I'm happy that I'm moving in the right direction. And I can already tell a difference in the way my clothes are fitting, so that's a good sign. My sweet husband had me hold 6 pounds of butter to show me how much weight six pounds is, and I have to say that it was very effective. Haha! :)

Here are a few thoughts I had this week.

1. Yesterday was a particularly tempting day for me. I gave up my husband's yummy pancakes in the morning, pizza & cupcakes at a birthday party, & our traditional date night with Rubio's fish tacos. Because of this, I was SUPER grumpy. When my husband asked if I was okay, I replied with the following, "Oh sure. I'm fine. Don't worry about me. It's only Day 6 of the rest of my life!" :D Can you hear the sarcasm? But that is kind of how I feel. Even though I've set a goal, I know this will be a life long battle.

2. Turkey bacon is one of the most disgusting things I have ever put in my mouth. NEVER again!!!

3. I don't really enjoy food anymore. That sounds weird to me. But I find that I don't really look forward to food...it's just something I eat for energy...as a friend said, "It's just fuel!" This is complete paradigm shift for me. And I'm surprised at how much "fun" has been eliminated from my life by eliminating unhealthy foods.

4. A list of junk food that was presented to me this week (which I refused):

licorice

sour patch kids

starbursts

pancakes

pizza

cupcakes

ice cream

chips

6. I love SPANX and Diet A&W Rootbeer!

7. It's worth eating food I don't like, and therefore giving up food I DO like, to feel this good--at least that's what I keep telling myself. :D

So now I move on to Week 2. I can't wait to get it over with so I can eat fruit and whole grains again. Breakfast has been the most difficult for me. Think about it. What do you eat for breakfast that does not contain carbs? No cereal. No fruit. No yogurt. No toast. Not even oatmeal. Eggs have been my staple, and you know...I can only eat so many eggs before I swear them off forever!!!

So here's to only one more week of eggs for breakfast! CHEERS!!!!

DOH!

I have to record this funny little conversation that happened last week.

I was sleeping peacefully in my bed when suddenly Miss L rushes in screaming, "MOM! MOM!" I jumped up, obviously concerned by the alarm in her voice.

Me: What?!!! What's wrong?!!!

Miss L, in a complete state of panic: Miss A guessed her birthday present!!!

Me, completely annoyed: What! How did she guess you were going to give her a Mermaid book?

Miss L, looking guilty: Well, I sort of gave her a hint. And she guessed it! (This was was said in an accusing manner. How dare Miss A guess it correctly! Haha!)

Me: Well Miss L, you shouldn't have given her clues. Sorry. I guess you ruined the surprise.

Miss L leaves the room extremely upset.

A few hours later while ALL of us were playing in the dining room we had the following conversation.

Miss L: MOM! I'm so sad that Miss A knows what I'm getting her for her birthday. (Big sad face)

Mom: Well, I'm sorry. We can't do anything about that now.

Miss A: Wait! I forgot. What did you get me again?

Miss L, a big smile across her face: You forgot????

Miss A: Ya. What was it again?

Mom: Miss L, I guess you lucked out that Miss A doesn't remember.

Miss L: Ya Mom! I'm so happy she doesn't remember that I'm getting her a Mermaid book!!!

Miss A: gasp

Mom: gasp

Miss L bursts into tears. :(

Poor Miss L! We haven't talked about it since. I have no idea if Miss A remembers---I guess we'll find out on her birthday. :)